Your purpose changes over time. At least that’s what Lisa Michaud thinks (I kind of agree). I’ve talked to several podcast guests about purpose: what it is, how to find it, what to do when you find it. There’s a trend: your purpose often stems from some pain you experienced. We want to solve problems we understand deeply.
In this Own Up Grown-Up podcast episode, Lisa Michaud and I talk about purpose, goal-setting, and how to overcome your fear of change.
I think we put a lot of pressure on ourselves to make the right decision instead of just trying something and seeing where it goes.”—Lisa Michaud
Our purpose is always evolving
I believe we all have a core purpose which stems from a pain we understand personally. Our path to solving the problem is what evolves. We understand it deeper and see it from other perspectives based on experience, people we meet, media we consume, and places we go.
Discovering your purpose is no easy feat, especially if you’ve been driven by work or consumerism instead of personal motivation to solve a problem you care a lot about. It takes time to figure out, and that can be the fun part. Experiment, try things, pivot. Do what you need to get to the core of the problem so you can find the best solution. Imagine if we all lived our lives like this.
As I wrap up the podcast for the summer, preparing to do a slight pivot in September 2017, I feel uneasy. Podcasting turned out to be harder than I thought it would be, but I enjoy it more than I thought I would. Asking questions, talking to guests and interacting with people in person and on social media has taught me so much in a mere seven months about the millennial human condition. And I’ve only touched the surface. I’m still unearthing my purpose, though it’s definitely getting clearer.
I’m doing this publicly, which is uncomfortable, but it’s important to me that people understand that it’s okay to face change in public, amongst friends and family. You don’t need to act like you have it all figure out. People can relate to you when they know you aren’t perfect because they’re trying to figure things out too.
A success coach’s tips to overcome your fear of making a big change
Lisa works with high performers who want to have it all, a meaningful career and a fun-filled life. She graciously shares some things that have helped her and her clients get what they want.
- Know yourself. What drives you? What impact will change have on your life? Connect to your vision to understand why you want the change you want.
- Come face-to-face with your challenges. What is your biggest challenge going to be? What or who will get in your way? Recognize your behaviour patterns when you’re being challenged.
- Develop strategies and ideas for how you’re going to both stay connected and motivated by your vision and also overcome your challenges.
- Find an accountability partner; someone who you can check in with regularly and who’s going to keep you committed to your process.
I love Lisa’s example of getting married because nearly every married woman I know has had some nightmare experience planning her wedding. Applying Lisa’s suggestions to the example, think about how getting married will impact your life. What will the change feel like and how does it connect to the vision you have for your life? What does the perfect wedding look like for you (I’m working on a future blog post about this—stay tuned…it’s not what you’ll think it will be)?
Who or what stands in the way of your vision? If you desire a small, low-key wedding but your mother-in-law demands glitz and glamor, how are you going to deal with that without hurting her feelings (especially if she’s already offered to pay for the glitz and glam)? Now, figure out how you’re going to have the wedding of your dreams while making mom-in-law happy too. You’ll need to be diplomatic, communicate well, and you’ll need to stand your ground.
Whether it’s your best friend or a counselor, find someone who you can talk to and who will hold you accountable. Have you talked to your mother-in-law about a less expensive venue or a different menu? Your accountability partner will help you avoid pushing things until the last minute when it will all blow up in your face as everyone experiences pre-wedding countdown jitters.
And then apply this strategy to other big changes in your life. This is smart planning!
I’m feeling pretty jazzed. How about you. Ready to make something amazing happen in your life?